The year 2013 has been filled to the brim with life changes.  My dear Oz of 54+ years died on May 6th at Providence Hospital.  He had been 'rescued' many times there in the 7+ years of our living in Mobile due to many physical setbacks.  These setbacks eventually took their toll - he got weary, and left us.
Oz had many opportunities to leave our home to visit others but he soon became reclusive.  He loved and surrounded himself with books, mostly of the spiritual writings of deep thinking authors.  He lightened his time indoors by reaching for color.  With the help of our long-time friend and design consultant, Sue, the walls of his den and the floor coverings became an art palette of soothing shades.  He also remained faithful to his Alma Mater,Penn State, and worked on football pools successfully.  When scandal broke there and his beloved football coach, Joe Paterno, was ostracized, his heart was shattered.  Joe soon died of cancer.  Oz was bereft.
    Oz was a man who loved his job - one of many- when he retired, he lost motivation.  The early years of our marriage were filled with work and church-filled activities.  He used his teaching skills always.  For over 35 years, he taught religious ed to 7th and 8th graders - concentrating on the sacrament of confirmation.  He served as a lector, eucharistic minister, and in the choir.  Because of some physical setbacks, I did all the driving to his job and to our  church.  He used to say that I would get heavenly credits for this --
ah, that it would be true!
     My grieving concerns the last several months of his illness - he continued to drift away from life.  It is painful to think of this, and I shall not elaborate.
     My pastor and my spiritual friends have been a strength for me.
The caring notes from new and old friends were so plentiful and dear.  The flowers sent a loving remembrance.  Brian and Tabitha did their amazing organizing with me and our pastor and the day of the memorial mass was beautiful - Brian and Steve gave a reading -- Father David gave unforgetable renditions of songs and a moving homily.  Eric had spent a week with me to get through the preparations.  Brad and Becky came after the mass to stay a little while because of school and job commitments.
      Jessica, always reserved, displayed a deep compassion which has touched me.  Lauren chose to hide her feelings.
       This is the end of another episode in my life.

New thoughts:
It's now April, 2013 - birthday just passed.  Family love abounds.  I am so fortunate.  Awaiting the healing of my eyes after corrective surgery.  Paper work awaits; impatience soars.  Belated birthday luncheon planned with my beautiful spiritual companions.  Husband is sliding - losing incentive - doctor's visit tomorrow.  Possible in-home therapy if available.
Political humdrum with our President and our pitiful Congress.
My once strong input has to diminish because we are the 'grassroots' and more and more $$ are needed to continue the struggle.  Signing off now.